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Saturday, November 26, 2016

9 Ways to Improve Your Mental Health

Achieving better mental health requires professional help. People may need a therapist, or even medication, to deal with disorders like depression or anxiety.
But those serious diagnoses aside, we could all do with a little brain tune-up. Fortunately, science has some suggestions for how to overcome personality quirks or unhealthy patterns of thinking that leave people functioning less than optimally.

Here are some things that studies have found may improve people's mental health:

1. Set goals, but don't take failure personally
Most people are at least a little bit of a perfectionist in some area of life. Aiming high can be the first step to success, but studies have found that high levels of perfectionism are linked to poor health and increase the risk of death. Perfectionism is also linked to postpartum depression.
The problem is that perfectionism has two facets: Perfectionists tend to set high goals for themselves, but they also tend to worry about it if they fail to reach extreme levels of performance. The high goals are not the problem as much as the so-called "perfectionist concerns," or feelings of failure and worthlessness that come with falling short of reaching them, which can wreak havoc on mental health.
The trick to getting around this perfectionism trap might be to set goals without taking failure personally, said Andrew Hill, a sports psychologist at York St. John University in England.
One strategy, Hill told Live Science in August 2015, is for perfectionists to set small, manageable goals for themselves rather than one big goal. That way, failure is less likely, and so is the self-recrimination that can keep a perfectionist down. In other words, perfectionists should force themselves to think about achieving success in degrees, rather than in all-or-nothing terms.

2. Go outside
  The indoor environment protects us from heat, cold and all manner of inclement weather. But if you don't get outside frequently, you might be doing a number on your mental health.
A June 2015 study published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Science found that spending 90 minutes walking in nature can decrease brain activity in a region called the subgenual prefrontal cortex. This area is active when we're ruminating over negative thoughts. Walking alongside a busy road didn't quiet this area, the researchers found.
This latest study is only one of many that suggest that spending time outdoors is good for the mind. A 2010 study in the journal Environmental Science & Technology found that 5 minutes in a green space can boost self-esteem. In a 2001 study published in the journal Environment and Behavior, time in green space even improved ADHD symptoms in kids compared with time spent relaxing indoors — for example, watching TV.
3. Meditate
Meditation may look like the person is sitting around, doing nothing. In fact, it's great for the brain.

A slew of studies have found that meditation benefits a person's mental health. For example, a 2012 study in the journal PLOS ONE found that people who trained to meditate for six weeks became less rigid in their thinking than people with no meditation training. This suggests that meditation might help people with depression or anxiety shift their thoughts away from harmful patterns, the researchers suggested.Other studies on meditation suggests that it literally alters the brain, slowing the thinning of the frontal cortex that typically occurs with age and decreasing activity in brain regions that convey information about pain. People trained in Zen meditation also became more adept at clearing their minds after a distraction, a 2008 study found. As distracting and irrelevant thoughts are common in people with depression and anxiety , meditation might improve those conditions, the researchers said.
4. Exercise
Next we'll tell you to eat your vegetables, right? (You should, by the way.) It's not fancy advice, but moving your body can benefit your brain. In fact, a 2012 study in the journal Neurology found that doing physical exercise was more beneficial than doing mental exercises in staving off the signs of aging in the brain.
That study used magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) to scan the brains of Scottish participants in their early 70s. Among the 638 participants, those who reported walking or doing other exercises a few times a week showed less brain shrinkage and stronger brain connections than those who didn't move. People who did mentally stimulating activities such as chess or social activities didn't show those kinds of effects.
Exercise can even be part of the treatment for people with serious mental disorders. A 2014 review in the Journal of Clinical Psychiatry found that physical activity reduces the symptoms of depression in people with mental illness, and even reduced symptoms of schizophrenia. A 2014 study in the journal Acta Psychiatrica Scandinavica found that adding an exercise program to the treatment plan for post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) reduced patients' symptoms and improved their sleep.
5. Be generous in your relationships
A giving relationship is a happy relationship, according to a 2011 study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family. In the study, couples with children who reported high levels of generosity with one another were more satisfied in their marriages and more likely to report high levels of sexual satisfaction.Moreover, studies show that keeping a committed relationship strong can be a big boon for your mental health. People in the early stages of a marriage or a cohabitating relationship experience a short-term boost in happiness and a drop in depression, according to a 2012 study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family. And among same-sex couples, the official designation of marriage appears to boost psychological functioning over domestic partnerships (though domestic partnerships provided a boost, too).
Being generous in nonromantic relationships can provide a direct mental health boost, too. A 2013 study in the American Review of Public Administration found that people who prioritized helping others at work reported being happier with life 30 years later.
6. Use social media wisely
In general, having social connections is linked to better mental health. However, maintaining friendships over Facebook and other social media sites can be fraught with problems. Some research suggests that reading other people's chipper status updates makes people feel worse about themselves — particularly if those other people have a large friend list, which may lead to a lot of showing off. Those findings suggest that limiting your friend list to people who you feel particularly close to might help you avoid seeing a parade of peacocking status updates from people who seem to have perfect lives.Time on social networking sites has been linked to depressive symptoms, though it's not clear whether the mental health problems or the social media usage comes first. A study presented in April 2015 at the annual conference of the British Sociological Association found that social media is a double-edged sword: People with mental health conditions reported that social media sites offered them feelings of belonging to a community, but also said that Facebook and other sites could exacerbate their anxiety and paranoia.
The best bet, researchers say, is to take advantage of the connectivity conferred by social media, but to avoid making Facebook or Twitter your entire social life.
"You have to be careful," University of Houston psychologist Linda Acitelli told Live Science in 2012.
7. Look for meaning, not pleasure
Imagine a life of lounging by a pool, cocktail in hand. When you aren't sunning yourself, you're shopping for cute clothes or planning your next party.
Paradise? Not so much. A 2007 study found that people are actually happier in life when they take part in meaningful activities than when they focus on hedonism. University of Louisville researchers asked undergrads to complete surveys each day for three weeks about their daily activities. They also answered questions about their happiness levels and general life satisfaction.
The study, published in the Journal of Research in Personality, found that the more people participated in personally meaningful activities such as helping other people or pursuing big life goals, the happier and more satisfied they felt. Seeking pleasure didn't boost happiness.
8. Worry (some), but don't vent
Everyone's had the experience of worrying about something they can't change. If constant worrying becomes a pervasive problem, though, science suggests you should just put it on the calendar.
Scheduling your "worry time" to a single, 30-minute block each day can reduce worries over time, according to a study published in July 2011 in the Journal of Psychotherapy and Psychosomatics. Patients in the study were taught to catch themselves worrying throughout the day and then postpone the worries to a prearranged block of time. Even just realizing that they were worrying helped patients calm down, the researchers found, but stopping the worrying and saving it for later was the most effective technique of all.
Venting about stresses, however, appears to make people feel worse about life, not better. So set aside that worry time — but do it silently.
9. Learn not to sweat the small stuff
Daily irritations are part of life, but they can also wear us down. In a 2013 study in the journal Psychological Science, researchers used two national surveys to look at the influence of minor annoyances on people's mental health. They found surprisingly strong links.
The more negatively people responded to small things like having to wait in traffic or having arguments with a spouse, the more anxious and distressed they were likely to be when surveyed again 10 years later, the researchers reported.
"It's important not to let everyday problems ruin your moments," study researcher Susan Charles, a psychologist at the University of California, Irvine, said in a statement when the research was released. "After all, moments add up to days, and days add up to years." 

Sunday, October 2, 2016

21 Things You should know After Graduation (Jon Acuff)

Saw this on time.com blog and decided to share with my blog readers. If you’re a recent graduate, you have lots of reasons to be cheerful. For a start, you have walked across stage, balancing a board on your head while wearing a trip-hazard, as ceremony demands. Degree in hand, you’re ready to embark on your post-university life. Below are 21 things you should know after graduation from high institution.


1.     The real world is more fun than grumpy adults have ever told you.
Don’t listen to people in their 40s who act like the best part of your life ends the minute you get your diploma. Is the real world all cotton candy and unicorn rides? No. But sometimes, misery loves company and recruits it too. When you start a new job there will inevitably be a group of people there who don’t like their job and don’t like being an adult. Avoid these people like the plague. They’ve bought into the cultural lie that a “job is just a job” and that you should only work for the weekend. Nonsense. Your job can be meaningful. Your weekdays can matter.

Thursday, September 29, 2016

11 interview questions and their possible answers


Interviews usually bring tense to job seekers. The more confident you feel, the more chances of gaining the interviewer attention. Be poised and hold your head high with these useful interview tips:

interview tips

1.   Why should we hire you?
If you hire me, it will be a great platform to showcase my skills. Whatever goals I set, I ensure to complete them within stipulated time.

2.   What is the reason behind leaving your last job?
In order to enhance my skill set, I am looking for better opportunity.

Wednesday, August 31, 2016

25 Factors to consider in choosing a career

It is relevant here to state that the choice of a career is not as easy as we sometimes think. The student should be able to answer the following career choice questions before choosing a career:
choosing a career

a.     Do you possess the required intellectual ability for the career?

b.    Will your present subject offering lead you to your desired career?

c.      Do you have the needed and sustained interest for the career?

d.    Do you have the needed aptitude for the career?

e.     Do you have the necessary personality qualities for the career?

f.       Can your health conditions and constitutions carry you in the career?

g.     Can you last the period, stress, risk and inconveniences expected in the training or preparation for the career?

h.    What are the primary reasons for choosing the career? (Monetary, status, helping others to contribute to societal advancement, etc.)?

i.    Do you or your parents/sponsors have the financial resources to carry you through the training or preparation period?

j.       Is your chosen career relevant to the needs of the environment/nation?

k.     Can you find employment in your chosen career after training/preparation?

l.      Are you familiar with the importance, nature, history and definition of the career?

m.  Do you have other necessary qualifications for the career e.g. age, sex and the general education for the career?

n.    Do you know how to enter into your chosen career?

o. Is your career offered (for participation) in the available institutions or workshops?

p.    Do you know the general conditions of service for the career?

q.    Are there prospects of advancement and fulfillment in the career?

r.      Would you be able to adjust to the environments and sociological environments of the career? i.e. would you be able to adapt to the geographical location and persons the career could expose you to?

s.      Would the career jeopardize or conflict with your religious and cultural values and beliefs?

t.      What are the advantages and disadvantages of the career?

u.    Do you know about the job hazards associated with your career of interest?

v.     Will the career make you self-employable or dependent on other employers of labour?

w.   Will you be ready for service, re-training or on-the-job training in the career if the need arises?

x.     Assuming you are thrown out of the career/job (retrenched) can you adjust to any other job or a career if the need arises?

y.     If your retire from the career, what plans could you make to survive?

You can also read:
15 Common mistakes in choosing a career

7 Basic Office Etiquette That Will Help You Build A Successful Career

15 Common mistakes in choosing a career

Tuesday, August 30, 2016

15 Common mistakes in choosing a career

Choosing a career is generally not a one-time decision; it’s a series of decisions, made as you progress through different stages of life, experience, and responsibility. Below are the various mistakes in choosing a career.
choosing a career
1.     Choosing a career because of the prestige attached to it.

2.     Choosing a career in which one does not possess the  necessary ability, interest, aptitude and personality traits.

3.     Choosing a career because a friend has chosen it.

4.     Choosing a career in which employment is either scarce or non-existent.

5. Choosing a career the preparation/training for which the family/personal resources are not able to carry.

6.     Choosing a career just to please parents and other family members.

7.     Choosing a career out of frustration or as a last resort.

8.     Choosing a career that may not be actualized with the school subjects offered by the student.

9.     Choosing a career without consulting professional guidance personnel.

10.    Choosing a career that one may not be committed to but choosing it for the fun of it.

11.    Choosing a career because of the monetary advantages.

12.    Choosing a career without full knowledge about the career.

13.    Choosing a career that would not help to lead one to self-actualization or self-fulfillment; i.e. achieving one’s career goals.

14.  Choosing a career for which one lacks the necessary training, skills and dispositions.

Friday, August 26, 2016

13 Must have Inter-personal Skills at Work

Interpersonal skills are those skills that are connected with relationships between people. These skills are very important in the work place to ensure smooth and efficient team work. They are:
inter-personal skills at work

a.     Language: A strong working knowledge of English language enables a worker to interact with other people.

b.    Critical thinking and decision making skills: These constitute the ability to think abstractly, to organize materials and follow instructions.

c.      Dependability: Dependable workers come to work every day punctually, follow through on project, keep their word and contribute their fair share to the work load.

d.    Relating to others: Being able to work well with other people; helps to get the job done.

e.  Good judgment: This is the ability to ensure that all work are accurate and logical.

f.  Maturity: Employers want employees who can handle matters in an adult manner, develop confidence and exercise self-control.

g. Flexibility: Office workers must be receptive to new ideas, procedures, specifications, tasks and equipment. Learn to adapt easily.

h.  Discretion: Avoid discussing the information with which you work, inside or outside the office.

i.     Receptiveness: No one expects a worker to know everything. Admit what you do not know and need to learn. Be receptive to other people’s advice.

j.     Integrity: Be loyal to your employer. Come to work early but don’t leave early. Do not excuse yourself from the job unnecessarily for one reason or the other. Do not waste your employer’s time. Time is money in business.

k.     Personal appearance: A lot can said at this point; however, note that the image you portray also reflects on your office. Dress neatly and appropriately. Watch your body language.

l.    Positive attitude: Employers prefer positive people to negative people because positive people think confidently and generate positive results.


m.  Team member: An effective office requires group effort. Help others when you are not busy. Offering help to a colleague may bring you a return favour at a time you need help most.

Viewers also read:
The Importance of Self-evaluation in Job hunt/search
5 Tips To Boost Confidence at a Job Interview

The Importance of Self-evaluation in Job hunt/search

Self-appraisal can encourage employees to become mindful of areas where they need to improve and it can reveal attitudes and biases a manger might never guess from observation. Below are the needs for self-evaluation;
self-evaluation

i.                   Self-evaluation helps the job seeker assess his capabilities in respect of the job he intends doing.
ii.                 The applicant is able to know whether he has the right qualification for the job.

Wednesday, August 24, 2016

10 Ways Of Organizing Your Home/Office

Office administration is a set of day-to-day activities that are related to financial planning, record keeping & billing, personnel, physical distribution and logistics, within an organization. Organization breeds success. A clean and well-kept office makes a strong impression on how employees view their jobs. To get started the following tips will help you;
organizing your office

1.     Develop a system for tracking your daily activities, such as a "things to do" list.
2.     Eliminate clutter, allot time for periodic sifting and sorting: discard, give away, or sell surplus possessions.
3.     Organize your office and home so everything is accessible; use active and inactive criteria for placing items.
4.     Use an organizing principle for organizing your files; alphabetically, by number, color, chronologically etc.
5.     For a few, a messy desk is the sign of genius. for most, a messy desk is the sign of disorganization and neglected paperwork. Budget regular time to file and clear off your desk.
6.     Get into the habit of dating what you are working on so it will be easier to keep it organized. Date written material on the front or back; incorporate a date into the name of a computer file.
7.     To avoid lateness, give yourself an extra 10 or 15 minutes to get to appointments.
8.     If you need additional help organizing and getting rid of clutter, take a course or a seminar, hire a time management consultant, read articles or books, or watch a related video.
9.     Create your own days or dates, on a weekly, monthly, or annual basis, to clean off your desk, your files, your closets, or to overhaul your organizing system.
10.                        Have a handy the names, addresses, phone numbers and pick up schedule for charities, recycling, or resale shops that will welcome your old stuff or reading materials to get rid of your clutter.

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Tuesday, August 23, 2016

5 Tips To Boost Confidence at a Job Interview

Job hunt is a very stressful aspect of one’s life; it takes motivation and being positive to get the right and dream job. Interviews usually bring tense to job seekers. The more confident you feel, the more chances of gaining the interviewer attention. Be poised and hold your head high with these useful interview tips:

1.     Body Postures
Usually the mind controls all our actions and movement, but it is possible to use the body to trick the mind into feeling a certain way. Slouching or slumping and crossing your arms are all examples of closed off postures, and when we feel small, we tend to exhibit these poses. If you spend a little time opening yourself up and

Sunday, July 3, 2016

Ten Things You Can Do To Improve Your Mental Health

Mental health is a level of psychological well-being, or an absence of mental illness. It is the psychological state of someone who is functioning at a satisfactory level of emotional and behavioral adjustment.

Try these tips to help find the right balance in your life.
how to improve our mental health

1. Value yourself:
Treat yourself with kindness and respect, and avoid self-criticism. Make time for your hobbies and favorite projects, or broaden your horizons. Do a daily crossword puzzle, plant a garden, take dance lessons, learn to play an instrument or become fluent in another language.

2. Take care of your body:
Taking care of yourself physically can improve your mental health. Be sure to:
  • Eat nutritious meals
  • Avoid cigarettes
  • Drink plenty of water
  • Exercise, which helps decrease depression and anxiety and improve moods
  • Get enough sleep. Researchers believe that lack of sleep contributes to a high rate of depression in college students.
3. Surround yourself with good people:
People with strong family or social connections are generally healthier than those who lack a support network. Make plans with supportive family members and friends, or seek out activities where you can meet new people, such as a club, class or support group.

4. Give yourself:
Volunteer your time and energy to help someone else. You'll feel good about doing something tangible to help someone in need — and it's a great way to meet new people.

5. Learn how to deal with stress:
Like it or not, stress is a part of life. Practice good coping skills: Try One-Minute Stress Strategies, do Tai Chi, exercise, take a nature walk, play with your pet or try journal writing as a stress reducer. Also, remember to smile and see the humor in life. Research shows that laughter can boost your immune system, ease pain, relax your body and reduce stress.

6. Quiet your mind:
Try meditating, Mindfulness and/or prayer. Relaxation exercises and prayer can improve your state of mind and outlook on life. In fact, research shows that meditation may help you feel calm and enhance the effects of therapy.

7. Set realistic goals:
Decide what you want to achieve academically, professionally and personally, and write down the steps you need to realize your goals. Aim high, but be realistic and don't over-schedule. You'll enjoy a tremendous sense of accomplishment and self-worth as you progress toward your goal. Wellness Coaching, free to U-M students, can help you develop goals and stay on track.

8. Break up the monotony:
Although our routines make us more efficient and enhance our feelings of security and safety, a little change of pace can perk up a tedious schedule. Alter your jogging route, plan a road-trip, take a walk in a different park, hang some new pictures or try a new restaurant.

9. Avoid alcohol and other drugs:
Keep alcohol use to a minimum and avoid other drugs. Sometimes people use alcohol and other drugs to "self-medicate" but in reality, alcohol and other drugs only aggravate problems.

10. Get help when you need it:
Seeking help is a sign of strength — not a weakness. And it is important to remember that treatment is effective. People who get appropriate care can recover from mental illness and substance abuse disorders and lead full, rewarding lives.

*Adapted from the National Mental Health Association/National Council for Community Behavioral Healthcare

Thursday, June 30, 2016

6 Steps To Kickstart Your Career As A University Freshman

So, you and your parents have just invested a significant amount of money for your university education. As a freshman, what can you do to make sure you get your money’s worth? How will you assure a return on your investment (ROI)?

Step 1: Get Organized
Developing a strong, structured time management routine is crucial to being successful in college. Your first semester will set the tone for your following four years. It is imperative that you establish a strong GPA that first semester because maintaining a high GPA is much easier than trying to bring up a low one.

Being organized will also keep you healthy, reduce your stress levels, and prevent fatigue.
Work on maximizing your time between the hours of 8am and 5pm, Monday through Friday. Take advantage of free time between classes to work on homework, projects, career development, and exercise. This will free up your evenings and weekends for additional activities, rest, and relaxation. Then, spend a few hours at the end of your weekend to review and plan for the following week.

Step 2: Schedule Monthly Meetings With A Career Coach Because career development is a process that takes as many semesters as your established major, scheduling career coaching appointments monthly will benefit you tremendously. Every college has a career development office. Locate it and visit your first semester. Then, establish a relationship with this office
and keep consistent appointments with a career coach. He/she will help you plan out your professional
development goals for each semester.
If you do not do this, you will not be educated on how to transition from student to professional. Would you dare wait until your final semester of college to visit your professors, attend class, and follow through with your major requirements for graduation? Of course not! So, why would you dare make the mistake of doing this with your career development?

Step 3: Engage In Your Career Development
The majority of students who fail to attend and participate in career development events do so because
they choose not to engage and prioritize this development. Again, it is imperative that students educate
themselves on how to transition from student to professional. Establish and keep consistent appointments with a career coach so you can identify professional interests, build strategies for out of classroom experiences, identify strong, mentor-based internships, and establish a strong professional brand. Learning to be professional starts freshman year, not senior year.

Step 4: Investigate Extra Curricular Activities
Once you have identified professional interests, it is time to celebrate those interests and meet others who have those same interests. This is where extra curricular activities come in. As a freshman, finding a community that celebrates these same interests will help you learn more about yourself, your goals and passions, and your interpersonal style. College provides an abundance of clubs and activities for students to choose from, so investigate these choices and participate starting your freshman year. This will set the
stage for future leadership opportunities within these clubs or activities and will help strengthen your
professional interests.

Step 5: Create Your LinkedIn Profile
Establishing a professional on line presence begins freshman year. Yes, students need to clean up their Facebook page and even lock it down, if preferred. However, the main focus freshman year, is to establish your LinkedIn profile. LinkedIn is a professional networking site every bit as relevant to first year college students as it is to seasoned professionals.
The difference is in the strategies used by freshman versus seasoned professionals. Freshman can research
alumni, learn about their majors and subsequent careers, research those careers and the companies in which they work and learn tons about the professional world. And, the career development coaches and staff can assist freshman in building their profiles and using the site strategically.


Step 6: Get A Mentor
Because your first year in college is a huge transition, it can be a tremendous help to build a relationship with someone a bit ahead of you. Someone who has recently been in your shoes, can guide you, give you advice and support you through this transition. This is where mentoring comes in. Ask the career development office if they can assist you in locating a mentor. Alumni can be fabulous mentors for freshman and a career coach can assist you in making connections with alumni through LinkedIn.


These are six easy steps to accomplish during your freshman year. Remember, you have made a significant financial investment to attend college, so follow these steps and you will be on your way to gaining a huge ROI.

Wednesday, June 29, 2016

21 powerful lessons to remember in life

Yesterday is a beautiful reflection. Today is a new beginning. Tomorrow is a limitless possibility. On my birthday am sharing 21 life lessons i have experienced while living.
life lessons

1. Never give up on anything. Miracle's happen everyday.

2. It is better to strive for excellence than perfection.

Sunday, June 26, 2016

HOW TO WIN OVER YOUR FEARS

If you really want to do something
you will always find a way.
But if you don't want to do it,
you will find execuses.
win over your fears

The easiest way to combat fear is by not using excuses. Instead, you need to look for positive approaches to accomplish your goal. If you want to start a business, attend a meeting at the Better Business Bureau. Read some national magazines like "Income Opportunities" or "Spare Time." Start reading the business section of your newspaper. Gather some ideas and do a little reading before actually jumping into a business. Surely you can find some spare time to read. Also, begin associating yourself with people who are in their own business already. If you're afraid to go out and make new friends, attend local business-related seminars in your community. Start watching television shows that are related to business. You'll eventually find people to associate with who know others and you'll be the part of a new crowd - the motivating ones! 


FEAR is always your enemy. Look at it this way: If you never try, FEAR wins by 100%. However, if you do try, FEAR only has a chance of winning by 50%. If you needed a place to live and only had $10 to your name would you allow FEAR to win and make you homeless? No, most of us would find a job or borrow the money to have a roof over our heads! FEAR is the root of failure, depression and lifelong problems. Are you going to let FEAR ruin your life? FEAR also will cause you to lose out on many other things in life. If you FEAR the boss at work is going to fire you _ it will naturally be on your mind day in and day out. It will eventually wear you down and you will begin making mistakes on the job. You will also get depressed and build up resentments that may have never been there in the first place. Facing FEAR head on is the best way to combat it. If you think the boss is going to fire you _ go up and ask him. It takes guts, but isn't it better than putting yourself through many months of agonizing torture? Are you full of so much FEAR to even ask him because you think it will trigger him to say "yes" when he might not have been considering it at all? Believe me _ asking a boss "if" they are thinking about firing you will put you in no different position than you are now. In fact _ it will have the opposite effect. The boss will more than likely respect you for your candidness and ability to face FEAR head-on. Is FEAR holding you back from a lot of things? Are you afraid to confront people and tell them how you really feel? Do you smile in their face and talk about them behind their back? What's so hard about being truthful but using tact? Doesn't it get rid of FEAR and solve many problems? Complaining is also an act that emotionally drains you and goes hand-in-hand with FEAR. In fact, FEAR is normally the root of any complaint. People don't want to admit their FEAR so they will complain to release some tension. This is a crazy merry-go-round! Instead of complaining, try to find ways to solve the problem.